So, I have done nothing today. Nothing. Except paint my nails and wash five dishes. I have been out of bed for almost 8 hours.
Some days I wake up, lay in bed, and think, “boy oh boy, this is going to a great day” and make a list of all the things I am going to do. Then, I get up, eat something, and fuck around for the rest of the day. Is this just low grade depression? Is it quarter life malaise?
I am reminded of the page I found in a friend’s writing notebook…It said “GOALS” at the top, and nothing else was written on the page. It was so amazingly awesome. It was like unintended art. I am feeling like that these days. As if i am performing an art piece about modern day isolation…that has lasted about 4 years.
I am too scared to go out and meet people, which is just outrageous. I could go to book groups, classes, knitting groups, soup kitchens ect.. but I look at knitting patterns online, watch British sitcoms and The Simpsons. I need to stop.
Okay so…GOALS….. goals..
Be here tomorrow for the thrilling conclusion….unless of course I have something better to do. Like sitting.
Oh, and the cat’s missing. So i have that going for me…



